All of your fears formed a basis somewhere in your journey throughout life. Your brain is, in short, an accumulation of experiences that created a narrative about the current situation.
The way your brain does this is by creating patterns. It does this automatically and has been doing this automatically since you were a baby. You were hungry, you cried, and magically a boob/bottle popped out of nowhere to feed you.
The genius you were back then realized that in order to get the desired result (food), you had to cry. Pattern complete!
The problem with patterns is that they don’t teach you the best way to get the desired result. Patterns simply tell us how things most likely work, they don’t tell us how things could work better.
That’s why as you got older, the crying turned into words. A new and stronger pattern realized that the desired result could be improved by changing the old pattern. Now instead of getting just any type of food your caretaker(s) provided, you could get the food you desired by using words.
What we must not forget is that there is more than one way to reach a desired result. A baby that grows up thinking that crying is the only way to get food, will never realize it could use words to accomplish the same goal. Brain
Forming new patterns to fight a fear
It takes a while to learn a pattern and it takes awhile to unlearn a pattern. That’s why kids still cry from time to time when they’re hungry. The older they get the more they rely on their words instead of crying.
And then there is you. You’re part of one of those kids that got older throughout life. You are the one with patterns in your head. It’s important to do a lot of self-reflecting to see if the patterns you created in your mind for the fears you hold are necessary, usable and/or justified.
A good way to fight a fear would be to look at other people. Once you see somebody do something that you fear, you should ask yourself why you fear it and they don’t. Since the thing you fear is not harming them, you as another human being, shouldn’t be harmed by it as well. Now, this counts in most cases and after using a healthy dose of reasoning and imagination.
Don’t just jump into the ocean with great white sharks after seeing someone do it. What you need to do is figure out what they know. Once you acquire their knowledge you can see it from their perspective and act accordingly when the time arrives to make a decision. The best part about this is that you can use your imagination to speed up the process. More about that in the next post about growing into your success.